Hawkey, Bulldogs and Baseball

It's that glorious time of year again. Hockey season is nearing the playoffs (and the beards are starting to grow), the NCAA Championship game is tonight, and of course, it's MLB Opening Day. So it's time to roll out a mega blog update.

Calgary Flames: Property of Patrick Kane (and the Chicago Blackhawks)
4 straight this year. Beat them in the playoffs last year. Took all 4 regular season last year. After a stretch where the Hawks looked like shit, and stuck me with my only 2 witnessed losses all year, Thomas D and I wrapped up our season ticket plans Sunday against the Flamers. Also known as the medicine to whatever ails the Hawks. So after Kopecky and Brouwer Power gave the Hawks the lead I don't think anyone was surprised to see Kane snap out of his slump as the Hawks won 4-1. 3 straight wins now for the Hawks has us back to within 2 point of San Jose for the #1 seed in the West (with a game in-hand and the tie-breaker in wins and head-to-head). So those terrible losses to Columbus and St Louis are starting to fade into distant memory.

Game Observations-
-Antti Niemi (aka The Anti-Goal) is starting to stand on his head more and more. He looks confident and since he'll be the #1 goalie this spring, allow me to fully jump aboard the Niemi bandwagon.
- Suck (aka Tomas Kopecky) may need a new a nickname. It turns out he might not suck. In fact he may actually be the most valuable 4th line player... who knew? He's had key goals now if 2 of the last 3 games including the first of the game on Sunday.

-I wonder how much the goalies for our Canadian rivals hate "Chelsea Dagger." I always envision Roberto Luongo having nightmares about the song, and I'm pretty sure that after the Hawks outscored Calgary 20 goals to 8 this season (and 20 of the last 23 scored after that terrible start for the hawks in October), that Kiprusoff must hate that song too. I wonder what happens if these guys are at a bar and someone puts it on the jukebox. I know the Hawks fans have gotten under Luongo's skin, and I kinda hope the same has happened to Kiprusoff.


Central Division Champions.
Before the start of the game yesterday, the Fuckstains of Detroit lost in Philly. Which officially made the Blackhawks your 2009-10 Central Division Champions! Of course, Sports Authority knew this for a while, because you could buy hats that said Champs for about a week. Even the win wasn't "needed" it was nice to notch up 2 more points yesterday, and when the scoreboard announced the Division Championship, the United Center erupted. It was probably the loudest ovation I've heard all year, and I'm really gearing up for the playoffs again.

#playoffFAIL
Recently, Thomas D and I have taken to twitter to make the interweb aware of disgust for Blackhawks fans were treated for the playoffs. However the guys at Second City Hockey said it better than I ever could in Sunday's Comitted Indian:

"I was surprised to find out that partial season ticket holders did not get a presale for playoff tickets. I know they did last year, having the chance to buy a limited number of seats for a limited number of games before the teeming masses got their crack. I don't see the logic behind that. Those who have plunked down more cash and made more of a commitment to the Hawks should get rewarded. As a season-ticket holder I get one. Even if it was just the chance to get seats for just one playoff game or a couple, those fans deserved that chance, and I hope the Hawks organization knows it made a mistake in not doing so. Sure, they'll get a king's ransom for those seats on the open market and won't even notice. Such is the way of the world I guess. I go back and forth from decrying to defending John McDonough and his ways, but this was most certainly a fuck-up, and he should admit as much or at least explain why they made the decision. But I won't sit on a hot stove waiting for that to happen."

needless to say, we don't have postseason tickets. I'm pretty pissed about it. Enough so, that I tried to get #playoffFAIL going as a trending topic on twitter. It didn't work, but @tomdmaloney and I (@TheErrDizzle) started using it to call out other teams... like Calgary. So I've got that going for me.


BULLS Update
#playoffFAIL! I'd like to update something here, but since the last game I saw was the one in Indy when 80% of the 920 Neely crew was together, it's tough. Between the injuries, the bad trades (see: Salmons, John) the losses and the general suckiness of everyone not named Derrick Rose I lost interest. They aren't headed for the playoffs, so I'll probably tune in during the offseason to find out which A-list free agents snub the Bulls offer first.

Title Talk
This is pretty much all you need to know about where I stand:



Butler is a 7.5 point underdog, and the Over/Under on the game is 128.5. Since I'm a degenerate gambler, I figure I'd break it down with my analysis. Butler controls the pace of the game as well as any team I've seen all year. Duke also slows it down and plays alot of games in the 60 point range. I'm gonna take the under there. Pretty easily. And if you're not scoring alot of points, it's tough to win by a big margin. I don't see anyway Butler doesn't keep it close, especially since Shelvin Mack should be back at 100%.
So take Butler and the points, and the under.
As for a prediction, well, I gotta pick Butler. Rooting for Duke is akin to rooting for the Yankees so I'll say final score Butler 62, Duke 57


It's the start of something new:
The Yankees and Red Sox started off the baseball season last night. But today is when it gets good, as the other teams get going today. (Editor's note*: I'm typing this before any of the games start, but by the time this gets posted, the White Sox game will be over)

I was pretty critical of a lot of the White Sox offseason moves, namely trading Chris Getz, forcing Beckham to 2B, signing Omar Vizquel and Andruw Jones. But the beginning of April is always that time for baseball optimism. Just ask a Cubs fan.
But my optimism is a little more realistic. The best thing that the White Sox did all offseason was hiring someone to ruin Joe Nathan's elbow and forcing him out for the season. Sure Twins fans will tell you it was a fluke injury, but I know the truth. It was too great for the Sox to not have been done by a hired hitman.
So that injury to the Twins, coupled with the Tigers shipping off Granderson and Edwin Jackson (as well as allegedly being more broke than Roger Dorn in Major League II) is pretty good for the Sox. I'll be the first to admit that the AL Central is weak as hell. And the Sox are running a starting pitching staff of Mr. Perfect (Buehrle), Peavy, Danks and Gavin Floyd. Anything can happen in the playoffs, so the whole key is getting there. Well the Sox have a potentially dominant rotation and a division that might be won with 83 wins. I have to say I like those odds. And if Jaun Pierre can do what Scotty Pods did last year, 83 wins is well within reach. So here's to mediocre baseball in a horseshit division, aka your 2010 Chicago White Sox!

AL Central Predictions:
1) Sox 84-78
2) Twins 82-80 - I hate these guys
3) Tigers 81-81 - Detroit Sucks
4) Royals 74-88 - They gotta finish 4th sometime...
5) Injuns 72-90 - Damn you Grady Sizemore

Full MLB Predictions
AL East - Yankees
Central - Sox
West - Rangers
Wild Card -Rays

NL East - Phillies
Central - Cards
West - Giants
Wild Card - Diamondbacks

World Series: Cardinals over Rays in 6

FUCK Detroit

A couple of days late, but that's better than a couple months. All I can say about Sunday's game is Fuck Detroit. Fuck them in their unemployed ass.

It's bad enough the Hawks had the second period from hell, and that all the skaters looked hungover, and that NBC had this game start at 11:30 in the fucking morning, and bad enough that I had to witness my first loss of the season, but then this nutsack goes and writes this horseshit piece of a story: http://blog.mlive.com/ottoman-empire/2010/03/chicago_blackhawks_national_anthem_tradition_has_to_go.html

Seriously? This asshole can go lick a dick.

The war veterans that attend everygame don't seem to have a problem with the raucous anthem. They are also treated to a standing ovation every game, so I don't want to hear any of this "unpatriotic" bullshit. This is just a grumpy detroit fuckstain with nothing better to do. I know you can't believe everything in a video games (otherwise I'd be a world class golfer, mafia member and general manager), but in NHL '10 they even call it one of the great traditions in all of sports. So again, FUCK DETROIT.

Quick question, what would you call Chicago if it sucked?


Detroit.

Observations from the game:
- I was a dumb hockey fan once, but I at least I didn't pretend to be smart. The same cannot be said for the idiots populating the 300 level nowadays. I'm all for new fans, I was one recently too, but at least get your shit straight. We can't trade Versteeg for Ovechkin, Corey Crawford is not the answer in goal, and don't be afraid to point out our skaters turning the puck over in their own zone before chastising the goalies.
-I don't like to blame the Zebras, but holy hell they were terrible in this game.
-Fuck NBC. There's absolutely no good reason for a hockey game to start before noon. When you're fighting church traffic on your way to the stadium, there's something seriously wrong. And lucky me, my tickets this Sunday are for a game which NBC decided to start at 11 FUCKING 30 again... If it wasn't for Community and The Office I'd boycott the channel.

Blackhawks - Red Wings preview

Been a while since I posted a blog... things were crazy busy in December with a lot of games and not a lot of time for writing. Then I only attended 3 or so games since the calendar year and was lazy... but with the rivals assbags in coming to town tomorrow, I thought I'd get in the mood. So enjoy the preview:

Mother Nature is a whore, but she can't stop the mojo

Game 7: W 2-1/OT vs. Rangers: Another game, another overtime, and another win for the Blackhawks, this time against the NY Rangers. For a change it was Byfuglien providing the OT heroics. I know what you're thinking (I have that ESPN or whatever it's called). You think I made a mistake because there's no way in hell Byfuglien could have been a hero, but look I have evidence! This would have run me and Thomas D's record to a perfect 7-0, except that he didn't make it because work hates him, and mother nature (who is a whore) shit on northwest Indiana and Chicago the last two days. So he didn't make it, but Camp took his seat (literally) and extended the streak. So suck on that mother nature!!

The Hawks really didn't give me anything to complain about, as even perpetual targets "Suck", "Soup", and "The French F-Bomb" played well enough to avoid pot-shots by me. You know, unless I want to bitch about "The French F-Bomb" giving up a goal, or "Soup" doing a couple more spin moves, but that's kinda nit-picking in a game that the Hawks won.

But the real story of the game was New York goalie, Henrik Lundqvist. This dude nearly stole the game for the Rangers. The Hawks kicked New York's ass up and down the ice all night. They outshot them 16-5 in the 1st, 14-10 in the 2nd, and 11-3 in the 3rd/OT... but Lundqvist stood on his head all night (a hockey expression I love by the way) and prevented the Hawks from punching one in til just under 6 minutes remained. Toews broke through with a power play scrum and the pucked just slid in for once.

Overtime was it's usual frenetic pace, after a couple of missed shots by both teams, Big Buff got on the breakaway (I swear I'm not making this up) made a nice move and got the 41st shot of the night past Lundqvist for the winner.

Random notes/thoughts/happenings tonight:
-Learned the names of 2 people we've sat next to for 4 or 5 games now... (Ed and Basha)
-The other 2 people we sit next to got in an accident on the way to the game. (I told you mother nature is a whore)
-NHL resident fuckstain Sean Avery is on the Rangers... this is worth noting b/c I didn't notice him on the ice. I figured a fight with that bag of douche would have been imminent, especially with the ice time Eager and "I'll fight (and lose to) anyone" Frasor received. Kinda bummed for no fights last night...
-One of the loudest non-Huet/Detroit related boos I've ever heard happened last night. The Ice Crew thought it was a media timeout and time to come out and clean the ice... Refs thought otherwise and sent them back off. (male) Fans were not happy.

Kudos to Big Buff for do something worthwhile, allowing me to show him rockin this awesome suit

Current Record/Standings: 19-7-3, 41 points. 1st/Division, 2nd/Conference
Next up for the Hawks: @ Buffalo, Fri. Dec 11th
Next up for Me and Thomas D: Home vs Bruins, Fri. Dec 18th (sans Thomas D again - effing company christmas parties)

Lazy Sunday

Let's see, last night I consumed all of the ingredients for hangover. So I planned on doing absolutely nothing today... Unfortunately, there's no sound on RedZone today, so I'm stuck watching the shitbowl of a "football" game known as the Rams-Bears. Granted, I'm a Bears fan, but this game is like stabbing yourself in the eye with a toothpick. And now, its a halftime, so I felt like blogging about the past week and a half of sports.

Welcome back home.
So the last time I talked about the Blackhawks, I was skeptical/weary of the return of Marian Hossa. That night he scored two goals as the Hawks beat the NHL best Sharks like a red-headed stepchild. Of course, then the Hawks crapped the bed losing 3-0 to Anaheim and in a shootout to LA.

Game 6: Dec 1st, vs Columbus Blue Jackets W 4-3/SO
So they finally got back home Tuesday, for a divisional battle against Columbus. Thomas D and I were in attendance, and I even engaged in some friendly shit-talking with my buddy Mike who lives in Columbus. This was short lived, as the Hawks spent most of the game skating around like retard trying to hump a door-knob... with one notable exception.
The game ended up tied at 3, in a shootout that lasted longer than the Christmas holiday season. The French F-Bomb stood on his head, stopping 10 of 11 shots, which was just enough time for Seabrook to knock home the winner allowing Thomas D and I to advance our record on the season to 6-0.

After this dramatic win, the Hawks shit the bed again and lost to Nashville (who somehow has jumped into 2nd place, seriously). I'm beginning to notice an annoying trend. As good as the Blackhawks are, they're not exactly running away and hiding from teams. And probably won't. So they'll test my nerves and my patience as they dick around with teams like Nashville.

But all is well, as they redeemed themselves with a win at Pittsburgh. I didn't pay super close attention b/c I was eating pizza and drinking pitchers of fat tire, but a win is a win, even if it's just 2-1 in OT. I did notice that Hossa scored again, and has earned the right to be called by name, not the nickname I gave. Also VerSTUD had the winner, and Niemi played his ass off. I'll take it.

Current Record/Standings: 18-7-3, 39 points. 1st/Division, 2nd/Conference
Next up for the Hawks: vs Rangers, Wed. Dec 9th
Next up for Me and Thomas D: Home vs Rangers, Wed. Dec 9th

The WTF Sox Update

What the fuck????????? Kenny Williams is killing me this offseason. I had made my peace with losing Dye and Podsednik. And Fields was on his way out the door well before the Sox got eliminated from playoff contention. But what the fuck is happening on the Southside? I feel like I've been punched in the face.

We want to get younger. Add speed. Play "Ozzie-ball" (whatever the fuck that is). Alright, fine I get it. That's how you justify wasting more money than Congress on mediocre-at-best players like Alex Rios. (I can't wait to see this guy "earn" his $70M with a contract that'll probably last longer than my life)

Then what the hell? First we sign Omar Vizquel. He's a thousand!
-He's so old he left his wallet on Noah's Ark.
-He's so old that he owes Moses a dollar.
-He's so old that he sat in front of Jesus in the first grade.
-He's so old that his social security number is 1 (haha, just kidding. His a foreigner, he doesn't need a SSN!)
-He's so old that in school, there was no history class.
-He's so old that if he acted his age, he'd die.
Feel free to leave your own old age joke in the comments.

We back this up by signing Andruw Jones who is conservatively listed at 32, though he and his .214 batting average have me believing he's much older. Well he's played like it.

But we have nice speedy, young players who excel at "Ozzie-ball" like Chris Getz. Wait, what's that you say? We traded him. Shit, I guess my dog isn't as "in the know" as his. Well this makes total fucking sense right.

Kenny Williams has said these moves are bolstering the Sox bench with quality players. Well, despite my difference of opinion on what's "quality" I can understand his logic. Except for one fatal flaw.... WE DON'T HAVE A QUALITY STARTING LINEUP! Call me crazy, but the offseason should be spent making moves to make the team better. Last year, the Yankees went after key guys like CC Sabathia, AJ Burnett, and Mark Teixeira; all of whom are key starters. Oh, and they won the damn World Series.

Now, I don't expect the Sox to go out and break the bank. They've accidentally done that already with the pick-ups Rios and Peavy, and the extensions Buerhle and Konerko are playing under. But would it be too hard to find some starters? Preferably a lead-off hitter since evidently ours wasn't worth keeping. Or find players who'll enable our guys to stop playing out of position (Ramirez is playing SS despite being better when at 2nd. Beckham spent last season at 3B, and will play 2B this year despite being a natural SS- I'm sure this is logical to someone, but I don't have that logic).

But it's ok. Rumor has it that the Sox have a keen interest in Coco Crisp, presumably as a leadoff hitter because he's fast. (Either that or they're looking for that elusive marketing deal with Cocoa Krispies) Call me skeptical, but I don't think a 30-year old who's been battling injuries, coming off a season when he hit .228 is the answer. Especially since he plays the same position as the overpriced Rios. I just don't see this helping. Is Chone Figgins really too much to ask for?

Anyway I'm looking forward to the season rooting for my adopted national league team (Phillies) for a full season instead of just after the White Sox season ends.


EDITOR'S NOTE: (that's right I editor's noted myself) The last time I was this pissed during an off-season it was the summer we traded Carlos Lee for Scott Podsednik and Luis Vizcaino... the Sox won the World Series the following season. Let's see where this goes...

Being weary of Marian Hossa/Hawkey update

So once again, I've probably taken waaay too long to update this amazingly terrific sports blog. But once again, I don't give a rat's ass, so the 2 or 3 people that actually read this can suck it up. Or stop reading. I don't care.

So on to Hawks.
Thomas D and I are now a whopping 5-0 in person this season. Granted, this game was a while ago, but here's my quick recap as I now remember it, before diving into the subject of the blog.

Game 5: Sun. Nov 15th, San Jose Sharks @ Blackhawks... W 4-3/OT
The Hawks capped off a perfect 4-0 homestand with a key win over the team with the best record in the West. The Sharks jumped out to a 3-1 lead, but the Hawks came right back and tied it in the 2nd period. Nothing happened in the 3rd, then Seabrook scored quickly into overtime to send us home.

Since then the Hawks started their annual circus road trip out with a bang, kicking the shit out of Calgary 7-1, smacking around Edmonton 5-2, then surviving a slugfest with Vancouver 1-0. That makes a 7 game winning streak and bring us up to now, the day before their next game, against the San Jose Sharks. This game is significant as it marks the return (start?) of the "$60M Injury".

Everyone and their mother has an opinion on the return of Hossa. (Great hockey blog story here. And another good blog story here, by people who write more than me.) Personally, I'm a little skeptical. Granted, I haven't been a hockey guy for a long time. But I've seen shit like this before. The "Savior" comes in and automatically a team is supposed to win everything. Well this Blackhawks bandwagon is getting crowded in a hurry. Meanwhile, we've seen nothing from this guy yet. Hence, the $60M Injury nickname. (FYI, this nickname will stand til I'm sufficiently impressed with his play) While I don't doubt Hossa to be a great talent (you have to be to earn that kind of money, right?) But here's my concerns:
-I'm considerably worried about how he fits into this team. His cap number has already made re-signing Kane, Toews and Keith more difficult than it should be and is most likely going to force Sopel out of town for nothing other than cap relief (though I'd be a dick to not note than Campbell's cap hit is worse, and I strongly believe Huet to be vastly overpaid).
-The Hawks are red hot right now. Hossa will be on the same line as Toews and Kane. This could potentially disrupt the great chemistry the Hawks have working for them right now. Especially because...
-His injury. That we didn't know about when signing him for $60M. I can almost guarantee he's not all the way ready for the rigors of an NHL game. The Hawks will need to withstand about 3 weeks of a "pre-season" for the $60M Injury. The next 3 weeks contain plenty of big-time games that could start to shape the season. It's gonna be key to play well, especially against some of the elite teams in the league (i.e. Sharks, Penguins) before getting into the big rivalry games against his former team, the Red Wings. Which brings me to my last point of concern...
-His playoff performances. The $60M Injury has been on the losing end of the last 2 Stanley Cup Finals. I don't know how this makes me feel. I feel pretty confident that there will be some playoff hockey in Chicago this spring. So how is he going to help. On one hand, he's used to going deep in the playoffs and his teams have made nice runs. On the other hand, his teams have "struggled" on the ultimate stage and failed to win the Cup. On the other hand how much of his team's efforts can be attributed to him? It's tough to say.

So I'm a little weary. I'd rather be a little cautious and find myself surprised at the success than the other way around. So maybe that's why I'm telling myself these things. Or maybe the media attention the Blackhawks are receiving again scares the shit out of me. I don't know. But let's see where this takes me.

Current Record/Standings: 15-5-2, 32 points. 1st in Division, 2nd in Conference
Next up for the Hawks: @San Jose Sharks, Wednesday Nov. 25th
Next up for Me and Thomas D: Home vs Blue Jackets, Tuesday Dec. 1st